The importance of asking for what you want and living authentically

Happy New Year! I cannot believe it is 2016 already. I’m not big into New Years resolutions because to me, if you want to change something, just do it! No need to wait until a new year starts to improve your life.

At the end of a year, and pretty regularly, I like to look back and see the changes that happened over the year and be grateful for all the growth that has brought me to where I am today!

2015 was a year of many life lessons and I am so grateful for everyone who helped me through it! A major lesson I learned and am still learning is to live authentically and always ask for what I need (without feeling guilty- a work in progress).

“The Great Loneliness- like the loneliness a caterpillar endures when she wraps herself in a silky shroud and begins the long transformation from chrysalis to butterfly. It seems that we too must go through such a time, when life as we have known it is over- when being a caterpillar feels somehow false and yet we don’t know who we are supposed to become. All we know is that something bigger is calling us to change. And though we must make the journey alone, and even if suffering is our only companion, soon enough we will become a butterfly, soon enough we will taste the rapture of being alive.” -Elisabeth Lesser, Broken Open

This quote is one of my favourites from a book I read in early 2015 when my health issues were still pretty bad and I hadn’t found my current doctors yet, needless to say I related to it, trying to make sense of everything I was going through.The changes in my life this past year have been amazing and I never thought I would learn as much as I did. I am forever grateful for the experiences I had and how much growth has occurred over the year, and everyone who helped me throughout it!

This year has taught me to reach out, let go of rules and rigidity, and never apologize for being exactly who you are.

As a life long people pleaser, I’m learning to live for me. I’ve always been drawn to people who are authentic and unapologetically themselves. I think because I’ve never felt like I was “allowed” to do that myself. I come from an amazing family of people pleasers haha it’s a learned behaviour that I’m actively unlearning.

When you ignore your own needs and live for other people to try and please them, nobody wins. I think this is because you end up resenting yourself (for abandoning your own needs), and the other person, because they can never be as grateful/appreciative as you want them to be.

Here’s the deal, anyone important in your life will ultimately want the best for you- and only you know what that is! You have to follow your heart, THAT will benefit everyone.

“Don’t ask what the world needs, ask what makes you come alive, and go do that. Because what the world needs is more people who have come alive.”-Howard Thurman

If you follow my blog you know I’m majorly into food and holistic health (or as my sister puts it, a hippie 🙂 ) which is why I decided to follow my heart and enroll to become a Holistic Nutritionist! I start school tomorrow and could not be more excited to be on this path. Starting school part-time meant switching my work schedule around, which as a dental hygienist, where I’m booked 6-9 months in advance, was a very scary thing to ask my boss to accommodate. I never want to ruffle feathers!

But I knew I had to do it, I couldn’t keep making excuses that it would be too much of a hassle or was I really sure this was the next step? Yes I was sure and I asked for what I wanted. I was so happy that my boss was so supportive of my endeavours. Hint: people never care as much as we think they will, give them the benefit of the doubt!

It’s easy to play small in life and live under the radar. However, I think we’re meant for so much more than that. But how will we ever know the extent of what we can achieve if we’re always worried about what people will think of us?

This year (and the next and the next…) I challenge you to ask for what you want in life, take chances, be you, and know that, in doing so, you’re giving those around you permission to do the same!

Here’s to an awesome 2016!

xoxo

Heather

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